The Downlow

My photo
austin, texas, United States
aspiring writer, English and journalism student, hails from Texas. likes include writing, coffee, books, whisky and people.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

a thousand clever lines

I want to stop thinking and write. I can't get my brain to turn off and it's really beginning to get frustrating.
This morning I woke up congested. Usually rainy weather is my favorite but walking to my 8 am class in the downpour was unexpectedly miserable. The coffee I made was beyond repulsive, either because I'm coming down with something or because the particular blend blows, and after I forced it down and the lecture ended and I walked back to my dorm to nap until my 12:30 class, I laid down in bed and suddenly it was like every unfortunate situation that's happened to me in the past month or so started playing on repeat, and I spent two hours lying under my comforters, trying to figure out if my stomach hurt so bad because of the coffee or me being hungry or the things I was thinking about and trying desperately to figure out where exactly it was that I had gone wrong and why I couldn't stop remembering. I went to a few other classes, and now I'm back in my dorm, watching the rain through the window to the balcony I can't use and pondering why it's not seeming to make me as happy as it usually does, wishing my foot didn't hurt so I could go jogging and that I hadn't eaten all those saltines, and trying desperately to just write, but nothings happening. I have a feeling this ties into a lot of other things that I hadn't anticipated and I probably should've taken that into account earlier.
What do I do now?


No comments:

Post a Comment