Tuesday, September 28, 2010
I woke up late for my 8 am, so I decided to go to the newsroom instead because I had work. I figured I would be late to class either way but I could make it to my job on time so I might as well. I was at the bus stop right by the library waiting to catch one to the communications building when a guy ran up and started waving his arms at me, so I took my ear phones out. All he said was that there was a shooter in PCL and I had to move. Me and this asian kid backed up about ten feet and stared at the building for like three minutes, and all I could say was, ohmygod, is he shitting us? Until a lady came out and told us someone was shooting off a gun and to move. Then I figured he wasn't shitting us.
I was in the newsroom all morning watching things unfold. There were a hundred things no one could confirm, and several that could be confirmed but were, in fact, not true. In the end it turned out the shooter was a nineteen year old math major with an AK 47. He killed himself, and no one else was hurt, thank God.
Today was weird. Police cars, helicopters, news vans and swat tanks lined the streets I walk to class on every day. The school was on lockdown, campus was closed, classes were canceled, I had to basically walk around the whole perimeter to get back to my dorm and when I got there I crashed and took a six and a half hour nap. The thing is that the whole time, while everything was going down, I just kept thinking about how if I had woken up on time and gone to my 8 am, I would've been in the building adjacent to PCL, the library where the shootings occurred. Kids who were late to the lecture heard the gunshots, and there were rumors that the gunman spent some time right outside the door. Why did I oversleep this morning? It's only happened once before.
I guess it's just a little strange, or maybe unsettling is a better word. Last night, before the campus settled down to sleep, no one could have known. I'm just glad everyone is okay.
Monday, September 27, 2010
By the way, in case you were curious, I kind of love you.
by the way, if anyone jacks any part of this, I swear I'll come after you. It will involve the legal system. I've been watching law&order for eighteen years, don't test me bitches, and don't even get me started on my vast knowledge of copyright laws.
p.s. I'm reading this book right now, Life After God by Douglas Coupland. It is beautiful. That is all.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Writing has been sporadic, but it's been going. I haven't written every day, but I've written a lot on the days that I've written.
So this photographer asked me to go with her as a reporter to a city in west Texas called Marfa, which is basically a dairy queen and these things called the Marfa lights (google them). I didn't end up getting to go, because apparently my editors needed me here, but I would've been covering a group of students going to this festival called El Cosmico, and I went to the festival's website and there was this paragraph about this thing called m, and I couldn't figure out what the hell it meant.
I mean, obviously m means morning in Spanish. And if you didn't know that, then that's what it means. But reading through the paragraph, I felt like it was something entirely different. They were talking about finding m and believing in m, and I was like what the fuck is m? Is it part of the Marfa lights? and then it hit me. They were talking about remembering that tomorrow would come. m meant tomorrow.
I think it stuck in my mind so much because I remembered high school me, who honestly really wasn't that different, I don't think? But the thing is, I wasn't stressed then. I never was, because if I had a huge assignment due the next day but I was too tired to finish it, it didn't bother me to just go to sleep and figure it out in the morning. I never had issues with sleeping on it. If something sucked, my mantra was basically "in a few hours, things will be fine." I think I forgot my m. I'm glad El Cosmico reminded me!
Oh, and the Marfa lights are really cool.
I'm not really a fan of DQ, though.
My stomach is rumbling. Today was long, and I wrote a story about an educational owl. I am happier than I have been in a while. I think I'm going to sleep soon.
I hope your dreams are beautiful,
P.S. people who shouldn't care about me but do will not cease to surprise me. I am obsessed with kindness.
P.S.S. sorry it's just another picture of my face. or plural pictures, I guess. whatev.
Also, I posted this the day after I wrote it, because the night I wrote it, I was too tired to press the post button. <3 @ you.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Sorry no picture again. I'm gonna start carrying my camera around campus so I can take pictures of things that aren't my face. :)
Thursday, September 16, 2010
... For now.
By the way, "like a stupid goat" is literally the stupidest simile I have ever used, ever, and you just witnessed it.
I don't really have anything to say, I've gotta be up front with you. I'm typing to avoid the desperate nothingness that is sitting in a chair looking at a mac that may well have been constructed before I hit puberty and thinking only about how good the cookie I had earlier was and lamenting the fact that I no longer have it. Because I ate it. And I have my laptop with me but it's about to die. And so is my phone. Pretty soon I'm going to be all alone with nothing but the pre pubescent Macintosh and the nine or ten other people in the room who all have something to actively work on, and then all I'll be able to do is fume with jealousy. And by fume I mean type a bunch of things that don't make any sense and post them as a blog. I'm really sorry I've been so incoherent lately, I'm just finding myself with constant busyness exchanged with stints of unusually free times.
Yesterday I thought I lost my flash drive with all of my writing on it and I literally almost peed in fear. So I ran to the comm school, which is a billion miles away, and it was still in the newsroom in the computer I had left it in. On Sunday. Trustworthy journalists? I think YES.
OOOOOPS I've gotta go. I have things to do now YAY.
I'll be back tomorrow or the next day!
LAHVE LAHVE LAAHVE GAGA AND YOU,
p.s. sorry no picture, I don't have access to any that I could publish without getting sued at the moment. :(
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Today in sociology it occurred to me for the first time that maybe the reason I'm getting educated and reading books and things like that is due to a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I mean, I'm gonna be honest here. Not tooting my own horn, but I think I'm relatively intelligent. But, is that because I convinced myself I was intelligent and then acted in a way so as to make it true? Like, does believing I'm smart make me smarter? Does believing I can write make me a better writer, because I act in a way that would improve my writing skills? And does believing I can't whistle hinder my many, many attempts at mastering that fleeting skill? :(
If that's the case, then why the hell do things go bad, ever, at all. Come on people. JUST BELIEVE.
With all of this in mind, I wonder what would happen if people understood that all they needed to do to get better was believe they were better and then act in a way to solidify that fact. Because reality is a social construct. Nothing is true unless you think it is. What would happen if everyone believed? It's an interesting world to imagine, and a little frustrating that it isn't happening.
I wish all of you were here in this waiting room with me. Its small and I'm alone and out of cheez-its.
I wait for 11/11/11 11:11:11 specifically so that I can wish you all the happiest lives that earth has ever contained.
p.s. I wish it were rainy today in Austin.
By the way, I'm still in a good mood. I hope whatever I wrote last night was coherent. :)
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
... no, yeah, it's definitely the right word.
Right now I'm super ready to go to bed. Like, all I have to do is crawl into my top bunk. But for some reason, even though I really don't have that much to say, I felt like blogging was necessary.
Tonight someone asked me to classify what I was writing as a particular genre, and all I could really think to say was science fiction. The weird thing was I didn't realize how right it was until I'd actually said it. Then, I was completely appalled when I explained to them my love for Ray Bradbury and they informed me of just how little they'd enjoyed Fahrenheit 451.
There is nothing not to enjoy about that book. If you disagree, reread it, darn it. It's a beautiful piece of literature!
I should really, really sleep. My eyes are drooping, and this morning I literally stared at my coffee maker for ten minutes trying to decide whether or not to turn it on because turning it on would mean that I would have to drink the coffee and then go to class and not turning it on would mean I could just crawl back into bed.
Also, before I go, I just want to say that Ke$ha's video for Take it Off is literally what I want my life to be like. She unzips her chest and glitter flies out!? I don't understand what there is not to love. And please watch the California Gurls video if you haven't already. omg katy perry is so FOINE
And Lady Gaga wore a meat dress to the VMA's. That is all I have to say. I am obsessed with her.
I'll blog again tomorrow. I'm not sure when? But I promise I definitely will.
HAVE A GOOD NIGHT, have the sweetest dreams the world will ever know,
P.S. right now I'm reading At the Mountains of Madness by H.P. Lovecraft. Pick it up. Boy's got skills, yo!