The Downlow

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austin, texas, United States
aspiring writer, English and journalism student, hails from Texas. likes include writing, coffee, books, whisky and people.

Monday, August 30, 2010

the reality is i wrote this all for you.

Those pictures are of me. See how versatile I am! The chap stick is called Yes to Carrots, which is ironic because I hate carrots. :( but i don't have to freeze to death in my dorm, because I have a blue fuzzy thing! :D The glasses have no reasoning. Don't judge.

On another and less lighthearted note,
My poetry class is frustrating.
Not in a bad way necessarily, just in a way that I don't really want to deal with. See, the thing is, with prose, it's all a lie, or at least it comes off that way. No one expects you to write a novel about your life, or maybe they do, but it's so easy to mask things as complete bullshit so you don't have to deal with the reactions of the people who know you, or maybe the people who don't know you. I think that's what I love about it, because everything I write is completely honest, but a total lie, so I don't have to worry about anything. It's my fun little secret that I laugh about in the back of my mind. But today in class my professor listed emotions off and we had to write down memories we associated with them, and it was like these raw emotions ghosted back into my stomach. Everyone else wrote about stuff from wayyy back in their childhood, and everything coming to mind was in the past two years, and most of it was in the past month. The thing about poetry is that you can lie, but it's so concise that it's a lot more difficult. It's a lot harder to weave a good lie in just a few lines, and it seems like lately, I've been lying a lot more than I remembered doing. I guess there are some instances that I didn't realize I cared about, and it's strange to suddenly realize that I do.

I sat down to write last night and nothing came. Wish me luck for tonight.
Sorry my mood is all over the place in this one, hahh. I promise I'm in a good one, I'm just a little weirded out.

p.s. you can tell me anything. I want you to tell me everything. I hope you know who you are.

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